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Venting

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20141024

Venting Empty Venting

Cap'n Clutch

Cap'n Clutch
Co-Founder
Co-Founder
I'm normally okay, positive and can make it through life in the new normal but, sometimes I get stretched so thin and then something major happens and I use reserves I never knew were there.  As you know my wife's been in hospital since Monday and only got out this afternoon. I didn't sleep Monday, slept a bit more on Tuesday and spent time organizing visits to keep my wife's spirits up and I feel like I'm running on empty and all the while life chugs on. I've been off work a week and now I could use a vacation. I need to bring my daughter to her social skills class in the east end for 8:30am, then go to the clinic to get a doctors note , with my daughter in tow and hope I have enough time to get my note and then bring her to gymnastics at noon.

It's like I'm in a damaged inflatable life raft in the middle of the ocean with one paddle. I paddle trying to get to shore and along comes a storm. Skies clear and along comes a friendly boat that takes me on board, feeds me, let's me rest and repairs my boat, then throws me back out there energized with a new resolve to make it to shore. Then my raft springs a leak and I patch it but there's still air loss. I stop and blow air in the raft every so often so I can stay afloat. Then the cycle repeats like a bad version of groundhog day.


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PTFlea

Post on Fri Oct 24, 2014 7:23 pm by PTFlea (Online)

If you think you need a vacation, then get away for a bit. Easier said than done when your wife needs care, but at the same time, this is how people get burnt out and need serious medical attention - and that helps no one at all.

I feel for you guys, Clutch. I think this entire board does. We hope you can recharge and get some positives going.

Cap'n Clutch

Post on Fri Oct 24, 2014 7:43 pm by Cap'n Clutch

I spoke with my wife's psychologist and she agrees that my stress level is probably helping prevent me from getting sick and agrees that if I ever get a chance to truly relax that I'll probably get pretty sick. I plan on asking the doctor for three weeks of sick leave (retro active to the start of this week).

wprager

Post on Fri Oct 24, 2014 9:35 pm by wprager

Venting is great. What sometimes gets in the way is people either trying to "help" or telling you to grow up or something similarly off-base. Vent on.

Cap'n Clutch

Post on Fri Oct 24, 2014 9:52 pm by Cap'n Clutch

Well said prages

tim1_2

Post on Sat Oct 25, 2014 8:37 am by tim1_2

Can't imagine going through what you are, and for such a long period of time. The time off sounds like a great idea.

Cap'n Clutch

Post on Sat Oct 25, 2014 1:07 pm by Cap'n Clutch

Not happening. Stress is not a medical diagnosis. Just finished talking to the doctor. I guess I just suck it up until it creates a medical condition.

wprager

Post on Sat Oct 25, 2014 1:14 pm by wprager

Cap'n Clutch wrote:Not happening. Stress is not a medical diagnosis. Just finished talking to the doctor. I guess I just suck it up until it creates a medical condition.

Don't talk to a doctor, talk to a psychiatrist. Look into "Compassionate Leave" -- you may qualify (although the definition is pretty scary to just think about).

tim1_2

Post on Sat Oct 25, 2014 1:21 pm by tim1_2

Cap'n Clutch wrote:Not happening. Stress is not a medical diagnosis. Just finished talking to the doctor. I guess I just suck it up until it creates a medical condition.

Christ.  Well, you can always try to get through to your management about why the leave is necessary and/or involve the union.

Cap'n Clutch

Post on Sat Oct 25, 2014 1:34 pm by Cap'n Clutch

I don't think compassionate leave is appropriate. She's not at a stage where she's getting palliative care. She has a number of promising treatment options at this point. I don't see management giving me paid leave for this either. I'll just have to figure out another way to get the rest and the break I need.

Cap'n Clutch

Post on Mon Oct 27, 2014 4:15 pm by Cap'n Clutch

Clutch is off work for another two weeks. Thanks to a diagnosis of situational depression.

Finally I can rest a bit and be more of the husband and father my family deserves.

Fireworks

SeawaySensFan

Post on Mon Oct 27, 2014 4:27 pm by SeawaySensFan

Cap'n Clutch wrote:Clutch is off work for another two weeks. Thanks to a diagnosis of situational depression.

Finally I can rest a bit and be more of the husband and father my family deserves.

Fireworks

The appropriate celebratory meal is poutine.

You're welcome/

Cap'n Clutch

Post on Mon Oct 27, 2014 4:35 pm by Cap'n Clutch

I'll have to settle for pizza. Free pizza is almost as good. Thanks Hoags

tim1_2

Post on Mon Oct 27, 2014 4:50 pm by tim1_2

Enjoy, my friend!  Not glad that you are depressed, but sure glad you got a bit of time away from work.

Cap'n Clutch

Post on Mon Oct 27, 2014 4:53 pm by Cap'n Clutch

Just knowing I'm off work and can rest has already helped.

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